After Murree

PM: What’s this new mess?

Fawad: I lost the count at 100,000. We were doing really great.

PM: 22 is the count idiot. And you?

Sheikh: I am an interior minister. That snow is not my concern.

PM: Trains were not your concern either. You broke the news, right?

Sheikh: Habitually.

PM: Okay, so what’s your take?

Sheikh: Had an omellete.

PM: Not in-take. Take on the matter?

Sheikh: I am interior…

PM: Enough of that crap! You are as much interior as Qureshi is exterior. You are more in the information ministry to stay alive. Now, tell me?

Sheikh: This happens everywhere. Just like train accidents. People die in the snow every winter. And people have died in the previous tenures of PMLN too.

PM: That’s thoughtful. Give me some empathy. I need to be empathetic.

Gill: A little empathy and people will blackmail you like they did last year with the dead bodies in Balochistan.

PM: True, Gill, but I need words to handle dead bodies. They don’t even decompose in the cold.

Fawad: Martyrdom. Give them shahadat. Badges of glorious death.

PM: But they went to enjoy the snow. They were tourists not fighters.

Gill: Remember the APS kids? They were also students in a school. Tags like shahadat and martyrdom keep the actual questions of security lapse in a cantonment away.

PM: Yes, people are stupid.

Fawad: And they died of their stupidity.

Sheikh: No disagreement.

Gill: Offer them martyrdom.

Shibli: In the name of Pakistan and tourism.

PM: That’s poetic, Shibli! Keep that up.

Fawad: I need to tweet. Tell me where we stand now!

PM: I will tweet. You all will retweet. Blame the previous regimes when you can’t handle anymore.

Gill: Noted sir.

PM: So, here it is: they laid their lives for the prosperous future of tourism in Pakistan. They are shaheeds. They sacrificed their present for our better future. When you were sleeping, they were…

Fawad: Don’t romanticize much. It wasn’t Kargil.

Sheikh: Can we call this collateral damage?

Shibli: It was neither a missed drone on a village nor a CTD action in Sahiwal.

PM: A verse again, Shibli. Keep that up.

Shibli: Thank you sir.

Gill: Unlike father, unliked son.

PM: Ok, this meeting is over. I need to snort… snore. I will tweet and you will retweet and let the administration do what they can do.

Gill: How long will we keep on answering for every death? I am tired of this. Balochistan, Karachi, Sahiwal, Sialkot, Islamabad, now this. Even rapes are somehow our responsibility. We need to come up with a solution for all the upcoming deaths and rapes.

Shibli: Like Deputy Commissioners on Twitter.

Fawad: Or like boys coming out as heroes in every tragedy, even when they are part of the tragedy.

Sheikh: Don’t cross the line Fawad. You sat in their lap, under the table, over the table and everywhere.

Fawad: And you Sheikh? You came out of the pit on your own?

Shibli: No need to fight. We have our arguments and we have dead bodies too.

PM: Again, poetic! But let’s end this. It’s too cold here.

Gill: Yes, let’s disagree in agreement. Let’s tweet and handle this on Twitter.

PM: Wait for my words on Twitter. And let me not be blackmailed.

Tweet: Tourists in Murree should have checked the weather. They should have gone for snowfall in the Summer when it’s easier. But, let’s pray for the martyred souls who have sacrificed their lives for a prosperous tourism future of Pakistan. They are shaheeds and shaheeds are always alive.

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