Tom & Jerry

Nawaz Sharif took 2 names. In return, Imran Khan took 3.

Wasn’t that the whole point? Thanks!

It’s nothing more than Tom & Jerry fighting to rule the same house. Remember Tom & Jerry? We never saw the lady who actually owned the house. We only saw her boots. What coincidence.

Looney Tunes… continues.

Random Numbness II (October 2020)

What would have been a whistleblowing scandal in the West, is a usual news in Pakistan. There never has been a Watergate kinda scandal here.

Bashir Memon’s (former DG FIA) episode could have been a swift blow to the government in a conscience country. At least it would have caused serious investigation. But here, it is just another conspiracy against the handsome.

Or – in the past – Hamood Ur Rehman Commission Report should have stirred the whole establishment within a fortnight. But of course, not here. The East was a piece of traitors. Done and dusted.

By the way, our commission reports have evolved. Resembling our CCPO Umar Sheikh, reports also blame the victims and their families and the public-at-large. Like APS Commission report.

Public outrage needs a direction. A civil or civilized direction. In case of unknown rulers, public and its outrage is clueless. How can you agitate against an institution with guns and without roses? How can you even think of morality and integrity in a mannequin as PM? It’s just a dummy with lingerie on for display. For your eyes only.

Yet “I am democracy”.


You know if your entire focus is on exhaling your rage, it will lead to nothing. For example, calling for ‘hang the rapist’ and seeing the rapist hanged satisfies you. Until there is another rape story to haunt. I mean a big rape story. Otherwise, it’s a routine morbidity in the state. From minor kids (boys and girls) to girls (without discrimination) to corpses (women only).

I am indifferent to the idea of rapists being hanged, just to be clear.

The problem is the problem. When are we going to look deep into the psyche and the upbringing of the rapist, and the root-cause of the problem? Their childhood? Their background? Their idea of crime? Their social circle? Their environment?

There is a need to make a committee of psychologists and sociologists to have a deep look. Even hanging a rapist daily won’t solve the problem. We have accepted the problem – good –  now we need to find the cause.

A lot can be found while benchmarking international practices where this issue has been studied and controlled.

Anyway. Back to the future.

Hilary Clinton once said, “you can’t keep snakes in your backyard and expect them only to bite your neighbors. Eventually those snakes are going to turn on whoever has them in the backyard,” That was for us, Pakistan.

‘Snakes’ are the ‘proxy outfits’. Our very own beloved. For whom we are begging FATF.

‘You’ is ‘deep state’.

And deep state is deep shit.

In another widely circulated video, a host asked Hillary Cilnton about deep state. Clinton defined it as a term coined by political scientists to describe certain countries like Pakistan where… well… what to say. 2 years and half a million rupees. Enough said.

As she cannot be labeled as a ‘traitor’ or an ‘agent’ – inconveniently as she ain’t Miss Fatima Jinnah – she is causing anger. Because she just didn’t mention Pakistan but she kept on explaining the deep state without a pause and without a mistake.

Ouch! Between the legs.

You can be angry at her too. Hang Hilary. Be done with it. But the problem won’t be solved like that because she is not the problem.

And look at the brighter side. Out of all the 195 countries, she mentioned us. Pakistan. The word ‘Pakistan’ echoed in the entire west. Goosebumps?

If all the missing persons are terrorists / agents – like Idris Khattak – and Ehsan Ullah Ehsan is not missing like missing persons; then don’t you think everything is tilted upside down in this land of pure? That was just an epiphany while writing a note of treason.


Get out of your comfort zone and stop ridiculing your intellect by reacting at the ‘effects’. Focus on the ‘cause’. Figuring out the cause will help to solve hundreds of issues around you. Including pizza services.

Look for the chef who is cooking the rotten eggs. These waiters, are mere waiters, working for their tips.

By the way, what a win for Noorani. Whatever the outcome, or your judgement, he will be remembered as victorious with mere words of objective truth. Just like hips, numbers don’t lie.

One article, couple of tweets, no apologies and check-mate.

And PDM.

Rally plans are all set for Gujranwala. New CPO has been appointed. Those who danced all night for freedom of agitation in 2014, are using state machinery against the opposition. Well, don’t be afraid. This is not even an opposition.

For two years, this opposition tried to appease the deep state. After failing, it decided to fight. The stance – which is harder at the moment than anyone could predict – is going to be a thing to watch. The funny part is, PM Imran Khan was not even considered by the PDM. The guns are rightly pointed at the guns.

With all the opportunists (waiters) united under the PDM, this is another episode in the history of the country with some hope. Some hope. Although, there are more chances that it will be shattered. But for once, with some politicians, journalists, activists, writers, and whistleblowers; this is the first time ever that the state within the state has been taken this harshly for their eternal crimes.

For Sale, Baby Shoes, Never Worn

Parents smell their children. They inhale their presence deep into their soul. Maybe it is an addiction. Maybe it is the fulfillment of being. Maybe it is because the two are one. Whatever the reason, it is the ultimate form of love and honesty.

Parents breathe in their kids.

Parents talk to their newborns. They not only talk about random stuff, but they talk about their deepest – most philosophical feelings – too. As the two are one, it is like the unspeaking one is understanding it. And every feeling associated with it.

Parents. Parent. As soon as a person becomes one, they become someone else too. They may look the same, but their entire internal system is changed.

Some parents have more financial resources than others. But have you seen underprivileged parents trying hard to make ends meet? Have you seen struggling parents in expensive malls spending hard earned money on their kids’ joy-ride? Trying hard to buy a burger for them? Going through sweat, blood and tears and giving them their all? Every single penny counts.

Parents – who cannot stand each other for one second are seen in family courts standing for hours on end each month to witness a glimpse of their kid. Some see their kid(s) after a fortnight; some after a month. Some after six months. Some after a year.

Parents – mostly men in family court cases – face severe trauma when their children are brainwashed and hate them. Yet, the parent is again present on the next visitation date. With the same smile. The same hope. Some hope.

The strongest of men have succumbed to parenthood. Bowed down through an unseen string with unimaginable emotional power. Who knows what this parenthood is?

Parents. Ask them if they will import pain of their kids. Ask them if they will trade cancer. Tumor? Kidney? Marrow? Heart?

A kid in pain has parents in pain.

A kid with a tumor has parents with a tumor.

A special kid has special parents.

With all the violence and hopeless conditions in the world, people still make kids. Why? Why do mothers in Palestine and Kashmir and Africa and Burma give birth? With all the threats and risks, they go for an eternal uncertain decision of their lives. They know there is something – unseen – missing from their existence. Can motherhood be explained with words?

And then there are those who sniff kids too. They prey on them. They plan and target and then unleash their ugliness on those who don’t even know what they are being put through.

A raped kid has raped parents.

A bleeding kid has bleeding parents.

An unstitched kid has unstitched parents.

A dead kid has dead parents.

Imagine yourself at the other end of the eternal torture. Parents do. They imagine this all the time.

Imagine your kid being raped. Imagine your kid in a coffin. Imagine your kid bleeding. Imagine your kid missing. Imagine your kid being lowered in the ground.

Imagine your kid’s school being live-telecasted with bullet sounds on TV.

Kids as collateral damage. Sacrificed in war. Over 130 were killed in APS in December 2014. We called them ‘shaheeds’ and were done with it. A mother said, “People say I should be proud because my son is a martyr. Would any mother willingly trade places with me so she could feel this ‘pride’?

Would you trade your kid with one of the APS kids?

Would you love to hear the same lectures of martyrdom at your kid’s grave?

Would you accept the APS Commission Report with silence as you are doing now?

People say He loves you 70 times more than a mother loves her child. I object.

I wish God had seen and felt all this too. He should have come down and lived like a parent. Remember that poem “Allah Mian thallay aa”? That holds so relevant. I wish He could have been a human being in pain for a lifetime before creating us. But then, I have other queries too…

A decade back, I was scared of such queries.

Today, I am not scared. Not of queries at least. It is answers that make me shudder.